summerdress.blogspot.com
does being in a relationship entitle you to having indiscretions?
seriously.
did i miss this piece of the venn diagram? the overlap has gotten enormous.
like a fucking solar eclipse.
seriously. the cusp of being completely superimposed.
the extinction of true love.
but life lives on.
so it seems i'm hapless at the moment. not unhappy. hapless.
not without happy, just without hap.
star crossed.
he loves me, he loves me not.
what is it all about?
all the great conundrums.
WHAT IS IT ALL ABOUT?
i always thought it was about
1-making yourself great
2-finding your perfect match (ie: mutual greatness)
3-turning your true love into something tangible: children
4-cultivating them into beautiful people with your pure and true love
5-and it continues
and i thought that the subheadings were whatever you wanted/needed to support (but never deter) this whole and true love.
but that this love was the center. the number one priority.
TRUTH.
nothing that will ever degrade the perfect shelter of your love.
it should be like a holy place.
a sanctuary, in the most religious sense of the word.
somewhere you can always seek shelter. without judgement. unconditionally.
and because it is so unbreakable and the bond so strong, you can turn away temptations. you can make the impossible possible.
*******
now i think how naive!
love empowering instead of debilitating?
ha!
what a handicap it can be!
*******
but surely that is when you know that it is NOT pure and precious and true.
true love is not the victim of circumstance.
it finds a way because it is truth. fact.
absolute.
IT JUST IS.
and i guess you can philosophize that it's all a matter of perception and blahblahblah.
but in this case it only takes two people to hold it as truth (bottom-line-kind-of-truth) to make it so.
does this make sense?
is there anybody out there?
seriously.
did i miss this piece of the venn diagram? the overlap has gotten enormous.
like a fucking solar eclipse.
seriously. the cusp of being completely superimposed.
the extinction of true love.
but life lives on.
so it seems i'm hapless at the moment. not unhappy. hapless.
not without happy, just without hap.
star crossed.
he loves me, he loves me not.
what is it all about?
all the great conundrums.
WHAT IS IT ALL ABOUT?
i always thought it was about
1-making yourself great
2-finding your perfect match (ie: mutual greatness)
3-turning your true love into something tangible: children
4-cultivating them into beautiful people with your pure and true love
5-and it continues
and i thought that the subheadings were whatever you wanted/needed to support (but never deter) this whole and true love.
but that this love was the center. the number one priority.
TRUTH.
nothing that will ever degrade the perfect shelter of your love.
it should be like a holy place.
a sanctuary, in the most religious sense of the word.
somewhere you can always seek shelter. without judgement. unconditionally.
and because it is so unbreakable and the bond so strong, you can turn away temptations. you can make the impossible possible.
*******
now i think how naive!
love empowering instead of debilitating?
ha!
what a handicap it can be!
*******
but surely that is when you know that it is NOT pure and precious and true.
true love is not the victim of circumstance.
it finds a way because it is truth. fact.
absolute.
IT JUST IS.
and i guess you can philosophize that it's all a matter of perception and blahblahblah.
but in this case it only takes two people to hold it as truth (bottom-line-kind-of-truth) to make it so.
does this make sense?
is there anybody out there?
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Every morning I am so scared to read this blog, it makes me sick.
I do not know how to act (same here), I try to continue my life but it's just impossible. It's like missing a leg before you have to run 10 miles, or missing 2 arms before jumping into the pool. I cannot control my thoughts for some reason I am cocooning all the time.
In my bed alone with my thoughs my ipod and dreaming of lake ere, cape fear, columbus ohio, the volvo, giant eagle, master blaster, wilco, bittersweet, chips, mc donald breakfast, lobster, uncle mike, great desserts, christmass, golf, love and hapiness, and ALWAYS but ALWAYS one person besides me.....all the time the same person. I do not see her as a physical person she is unther my skin, my energy, my reason for being here, the reason of my existence ... WHY? ... WHY? What is wrong with me....
I miss you Katel, I wanna speak with you every single minute of the day... I still have panic attacts and then I am crying for a long time (2 times this weekend) 1 when I was in my bath (saterday), the other sunday morning during my hangover... all the time the same pictures again, SCARED of you leaving me... the separation with you were and are still really difficult!
In a way that I am traumatised .......
Katel also you blog makes me crazy .... I am restless when can we talk....... I need to talk to you...
I am scared........
Big kiss and a very warm hug
Patrick